Remember my second week here when we watched a video and then after a man in our class had gold dust on him? Well since then, a few other people have had gold dust on them as well. Ever since that night (5 weeks ago) I have been praying for it, and tonight, I got it :)
One thing that I struggle with is believing that God is faithful. This is part of a journal entry that I wrote tonight. "God, give me faith. I pray but I expect nothing, thinking you aren't going to show up. They say you are faithful, and I need to see it." I also had been praying about His promises, and how I was having a hard time believing that He was going to truly keep His promise that He will show up. Then I read this in my Bible. 2nd Peter 3:9 "The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." Woah. I didn't even look for that verse, it just showed up. So after this, I put on some music on my ipod to soak in Jesus for a while. I was happy one moment, then heartbroken the next. I was just all over. After an hour or so, I go back to my room. As I am brushing my teeth, I look in the mirror, and I see GOLD DUST on my chest. Yeah. I freaked out, almost choked, then showed my roommates and then my one on one, Erica. Erica has had it before, so I went to her to make sure it was real and not some random stuff on me. Here is why we think it is real.
-When ever I prayed for the dust, i look to my hands and arms first. I never expected it to be somewhere else, and God is always keeping us on our toes, so He put it on my neck/chest.
-It wasn't there when I left, but it was there when I came back to my room
-It is only where I had my hands, which was over my heart, when I was praying
-It is no where else on my body. It would be really difficult to brush up against something glittery and ONLY have it on my chest and no where else, not even my clothes.
SHOOT. so I made a quick little video to show what it is :) I will try and get it up soon. I am so grateful that God gave me this! It is a physical sign that He hears me and cares for me specifically! I didn't feel anything special, but faith is not supposed to be a feeling. I am still processing that this has happened to me, since whenever I prayed for it, I had almost no faith that it would happen to me. I would think that I wasn't special enough for it to happen, because I am not as "spirit filled" as a lot of other people here. I am so glad that God loves me. He loves me so much He sprinkled GOLD on me! My brain can't even handle it. Thank you, Jesus.
To my Golden Girl,
ReplyDeleteLuke chapter 15 is full of parables about God's love for his people. How He will NEVER stop searching and reaching out for us. At times we will put Him on a shelf or put Him in a box until it is convenient for us to "get Him out"; but thanks be to God that He has a relentless pursuit of us! And I know Kristi how deeply and longingly you have been beseeching God to let you know His presence in your life is real.
Even without the physical presence of gold dust, I have ALWAYS seen you as an explosion of color! If the world could only see what we are privileged to see here at home...
Kristi...ahhhh...I pray, earnestly, that with or without physical signs that your faith is protected and nurtured. That in those moments of quiet when you are wondering if He is there and that He cares, that you will not even go down that road and instead proclaim with authority, "Not to us O Lord, not to us but to your name be the glory BECAUSE of your love and faithfulness" Ps 115:1 (My mantra!)
Thank God for the blessing of signs, but I also pray that your relationship with God (Father, Son AND Holy Spirit) does not HINGE on signs but becomes a daily, loving, COMFORTABLE, respectful conversation and a life lived knowing that even in the quiet times that you are a blessed child of God. BUT how wonderful when he does slam us with that audible, physical or heart gripping blessing of His presence.
Just a note: you WOULD NOT be where you are right now if God was not active and faithful in your pursuit. Remember the moments as each donation came in and the wave of thankfulness that came with each one because it was so unexpected? And all the notes and blessings that came with them? I sure do! (This is just 1 example)
So...Sparkle on my dear one, sparkle on. YOU far outshine the beauty of gold. And so does HE!
Love, love, LOVE You!
Mom
PS Love 2 Peter 3:9
That is so wild! I'm so glad you're keeping a record of all that God is teaching you. What a great testimony of his faithfulness!
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