Graduation

Well, tonight was the night. Our last time together as a family. We gathered, we ate, we graduated. We laughed, we loved, we hugged, we cried. I can not believe that I have only known these people for less than 6 months. It seems like a lifetime. They know me more than I know myself, it seems. They have seen me in the best of times, they have seen me in my worst. They watched me struggle, they prayed for me, they watched me fall in love with Jesus. They blessed me, loved on me, encouraged me. They love me and I love them. We are a family, that is what we do. Seeing everybody graduate tonight was amazing and beautiful. We came to Kona as strangers, and are leaving as a family. I have brothers and sisters all over the world, who I can call on at anytime. Doing a DTS here in Kona was the best decision of my life.

As I go home, I know things are different. I know that I had a heart change in the last 6 months. Jesus is not a stranger to me. He is not some random guy in the sky, ignoring me. He is my friend, my father, my brother, my husband, my everything. When I heard people describe him like that 6 months ago, I never thought I could have it. But I WANTED it. I was DESPERATE for it. I NEEDED it. He seemed so distant, but the desire for him was more than anything I had ever had. That is how I know he is there, by this supernatural desire to just KNOW him. I questioned at times why I couldn't feel him. Why I couldn't see him. Why I couldn't hear him. And in these last 3 weeks, it all clicked. As long as I had this desire for him, I was never going to give up. This is a desire that needs to be fulfilled and can not be pushed aside. As long as it was there, I was going to keep searching. If I never got a feeling, I was going to search. If I never heard his voice, I was going to search. As soon as that clicked, it all happened. I fell in love. I am in love with a beautiful man named Jesus. I giggle when I think about him and his abundant love and grace, how I don't deserve but he gives it away anyways. I barely know Him, but I love him. Never letting him go. I have the rest of my life to keep falling in love, and I am pumped for it.

The next year of my life is going to be a trip. I am going home to nanny for a few months, but am returning in April to the Kona base. I will be staffing on base for 2 months, and then I will be on staff as a leader in the Awaken DTS summer 2011. I already love these kids, because I already feel the love that Jesus has for them. I am already excited to see the changes that are going to happen in their lives. I am excited to see how God is going to move in the world using these students. I am committed to them 100 percent. I am so excited that the Lord chose to use me to work in these students' lives, to be apart of their heart change, to help them through struggles, to see them fall in love.

I know I have said it before, but I will say it again. THANK YOU TO ALL WHO PRAYED AND SUPPORTED ME IN YOUR OWN WAYS! I will never be able to express the amount of gratitude I have for all of you. Those who I know and those who I don't. YOU made a difference. Every prayer said for our team made a difference. Every tiny encouragement made a difference. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you all. Thank you for being apart of my journey.